So I have to admit I’m sorta kinda addicted to stuff about spirituality and becoming your higher self. I remember as a teenager and in my early 20s I inhaled books and many of them were self help books and books about Wicca. I got right into astrology, tarot and the whole thing. I always felt like I didn’t quite fit in and I was looking for my niche. A place to belong and a way of feeling better about not fitting in.
Then right before I met my husband I picked up a book called Buddhism for Busy People and then I sank my teeth into Buddhism. This bought balance to The Force for me. I’d started to meditate for short periods of time and my bipolar was calming the fuck down because I was able to adequately control my bastard brain. I found my spiritual happy place and something that made the world make sense. It was like someone brought the world into focus.
Side note – Buddhist teachings and The Force have a lot in common there’s more than likely a book about it which I should read.
Recently I’ve set off on another spiritual ramble except this time it’s not specific. I’m picking up books about getting in touch with your ‘higher’ self. I think this time around it’s because I’m happy oddly enough. I’m a little older, I’ve got a little life under my belt and I want to be the best person I can be. I want to put myself on a path where I’m content making the happiest life for the people I love. For me I can do this being my best self and if this means doing some inner work then I’m down with that.
Now, I’m not having some mad mental breakdown. Im not off my meds. I’m not going to next week proclaim to have mad psychic skills and become a medium for ‘the other side’ (which I’m not even sure is there just quietly). I’m not going to run off to the mountains, eat mung beans and balance my chakras with a raw vegan diet. If that’s your jam great. I’m still gonna lift he heavy things, eat steak and cake, swear, like Doctor Who and action movies. I’m just going to work on being a better me while I’m doing it.
I blame Gary Zukav, Endone and a trip to the library for starting this shenanigans. Not that I mind…