Recently I talked in passing about the fact that I had to change up the way I do fitness. While this doesn’t seem like a big thing for most people but to me it was. It wasn’t even like I was an athelete or competitive anything I just really enjoy the gym.
When I first started going to the gym it was tagging along with my husband and brother in law. I bought a few fitness mags and looked online a bit. The more I went to the gym the more I realised I actually enjoyed it and I could lift heavy things quite easily. This lead me to me buying a few programs and getting into flexible dieting. I started to become friendly with a few people online and sort of found my tribe. I became all about lifting heavy, PRs and eating all the things. It was great but as much as I lifted the heavy things I was never going to compete, I just wanted to be strong as hell. We even changed gyms so we could go to a gym where other people lifted all the things and it was great.
Then my hand shit itself and predictably most people blamed the lifting, It wasn’t for the record it was a heavy family history of arthritis I wasn’t aware of. So I was ordered straight away to stop with the lifting and the physio said no gym all together (ppft to that!). I tried to still here and there lift what I could and wear a super awesome hand brace. It was good for a while and I could get away with some stuff but then there was more pain and my hand stopped working. I felt so frustrated and upset because while I was never an athlete on any level so much of who I was was tied up in lifting. How much I could lift and out lift the guys I knew.
I started skipping the gym and eating like shit because I was depressed. I felt I had let people down or I wasn’t good enough. Then it dawned on me for someone who wasn’t an athelete or a competitor I was taking this shit way too seriously. The gym was a a form of stress release and fun. It didn’t have to be that serious. I could go and use the machines, save my hand, and have some fun. Besides half the people I whos opinion I worried about probably didn’t even realise I even cared what they thought.
So, now, I’ve gone back to the beginning starting with the very first program I ever did. Having fun, not being so serious and working toward other fitness goals because there is nothing wrong with wanting a cute butt.