I’m not quite sure where to start. Last week was fucking bonkers and quite legitimately the most confusing week of my life. I’m not quite sure even how it happened.
Sunday – there was extended family shenanigans that gave the grown ups a bit of a headache. While we had a bit of a head shake eye roll moment the world went along just fine.
Monday – Hunter woke up in a mood, River was in a mood, we had appointments so I was trying to hustle the kids into some state of readiness. Awesome. Out the door then Hunter gets upset over something someone has said to him. We have a chat about things that are fair and reasonable and how telling someone that you can’t help then when the problem is too big and to going to a grown up is ok. All on the car ride to school mind you, excellent, he’s out the car and I’m furiously texting Adam this leads to anger and more head shaking. Hunter is twisted up about stuff he shouldn’t be for a kid. Ok, fine.
Then extended family go and I grab Hunter early from school. Off to appointments and we’re out of our usual routine because Hunter is with us and it’s not normally the week he is. This puts River out but it’s nothing a small packet of lolly dinosaurs wont smooth over. Have I mentioned it’s still Monday? Everything is ok still an amount of head shaking.
Tuesday – all is going well until hell breaks loose with the kids in the bath. There is shouting and yelling from everyone. Personal boundaries not being respected (it’s not on to jump on someone in the bath) and that lead to a whole bunch of conversations about what is and isn’t ok. Now I know this all sound sinister but it’s not. That bought up conversations about the past that were super painful for Ads. Everyone finishes out Tuesday drained. This is about where I decided to shut up shop and decide this week is done.
Wednesday – extended family shenanigans still quietly going on in the background and Ads is organising a thing that’s causing some annoyance and discussion between us and a couple. There is stuff with my work that’s causing me some stress. Hunter has completely shit up shop up over a substitute teacher and the yelling from yesterday. He stays home.
Thursday – thinking it’s eased up but no. Extended family crap means more head shaking and more being pissed off than ever. Hunter still isn’t good and substitute teachers put him and all the other kids in his class out so fuck it we’re canning the rest of this week at school. Hell, I’d drop the rest of the week for all of us if I could.
Now I get there is a lot of vaugery because I’m not giving out all the nitty gritty mostly because extended family and kids don’t need their shit all over the internet. However the point I’m trying to make is sometime you need to pull a Gordon Ramsay and yell ‘shut it down’ Hells Kitchen style. Trying to struggle and push a mountain of shit uphill benefits no one and will only give you a stress headache. You gotta call time and buy yourself breathing room.
The other thing our batshit crazy week has taught me is that in times of trouble leaning back into my support system is good. I spoke to my Dad a few times, chatted to a mate at work, spoke to the kids psychologist to make sure my approach was helpful not harmful. I tapped into my spirituality because it’s what helped me stay calm. I got help from Adam and here we are alive, slightly smoking but we made it.
Life is shit sometimes and it’s more than ok to put your hand up and call a time out. Ask for help.