Don’t be shit at Christmas

Premise is simple enough right? It’s not. As someone who works face to face with people every day it truly isn’t.

1. Don’t be shit to people in hospitality.

Seriously. Chances are they’re working all holidays and a few of them will have to work Christmas Day (that’s me folks. I work 4hrs Christmas Day). Getting angry at them about wait times when it’s busy is redundant because chances are they can’t change how quick food cooks, what has run out or where your order is. When I was on the tools still we cooked 375 meals in 4 hours one night and that’s not even close to the current record (I think that’s 415 meals). That works out at about 1.5 meals a minute, That’s including steaks and other stuff that takes a fair while. It’s a lot so if you’re in a packed out place chances are they’re busting ass to get food out. Be patient, use your manners and if it’s warranted tell staff they’re doing a great job. Think Kris Jenner “You’re doing amazing sweetie” meme.

2. Don’t be shit to people in retail

I could almost write ‘See point 1’ but I wont. Retail workers have it rough. Packed out shopping centers, working overtime while everyone crams in their last minute shopping or Boxing Day sales shopping. They want to help you find the thing you need to make someones perfect gift however they do run out and they can’t always help. Now, the other thing I want to stress is ‘the back room’ or ‘in the back’ isn’t a Bag of Holding. You can’t just reach in and pull out whatever the fuck it is you need. It’s a real place with a limited capacity. Out of stock means they don’t have any. If it’s in another location within the same chain store you may have to travel if you really need that thing. Don’t get pissed off with the cashier, manager or sales assistant because chances are you probably aren’t the first person to have done their block at them today. Use your manner.

Its at this point I will acknowledge poor service is also a thing and you shouldn’t accept it. I have lost my shit at being ignored by sales staff and treated like crap at cafes but it not when it was for things beyond their control.

On with the list

3. Don’t be shit to family and friends

Sounds self explanatory but again, it’s not. Everyone is trying to get to see everyone on and over Christmas. Schedules don’t always line up. Budgets don’t always line up. People get drunk and are dinguses, transport can be hard, people have to work. Just because something doesn’t match up with your magical vision of Christmas doesn’t mean people don’t want to be there or deliberately being jerky. Try and be flexible. People also do multiple Christmases with friends and extended families. If people rock up and look a bit worn it’s possible that this is their 4th Christmas in 3 days (or if they had kids they may have been up since 4am). Try not to be offended if they don’t bust out with All I Want for Christmas Mariah Carey style. I mean if you can go you good thing but most people get tired. Also, if people have to work saying “just call in sick/don’t go” isn’t a thing if you want to stay employed. Some people are so scarred by Christmas past they actively hate on Christmas or they go on about the evils of ‘its only one day’. Let them be. You don’t know what made them that way and putting shit on them, forcing Christmas on them or to make them talk wont help. Be there, offer but don’t be a dick. On the other side if you hate Christmas that’s ok! Get your Grinch on! Be aware others love the fuck out of it so walking around extolling the bullshit you think Christmas is for whatever reason is just as bad as them pushing it on you.

Again, I want to acknowledge people can be genuinely bullshit at Christmas but chances are the same people that are bullshit at event. Yes don’t put up with that creepy uncle. Sure the racist aunt is not ok. Calling them a C U Next Tuesday over the table and having a screaming match probably isn’t helping. I’m not suggesting you put yourself in harms way either. I’m saying use some common freakin sense on when to go on boots and all.

4. Don’t be shit on the roads

Screaming at people over carparks etc is insane. I get they’re at a premium but goddamn it breathe. Shopping centre carparks are crazy this time of year so expect a mild level of fuckery when operating in them. If you’re prepared you wont be surprised if someone does something ridiculous. Same goes for the open roads. Allow for extra travel time and breaks. Arrive in one piece and don’t be a fucking statistic. I’d rather arrive late and have people pissed at that than be THAT phone call someone gets over the holidays. Check your car is full of water, oil etc if you’re doing a lot of driving. Be safe. If you’re drinking get an Uber, DiDi (they are not a hard apps to use), taxi or organise a lift. Be safe. 4

Don’t be a dick at Christmas

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